Socialize!  Find us here--->>
GANEPossible.com
  • Welcome!
    • #Write2TheEnd
    • Press / Media
    • GANE Possible Calendar
  • GANE Momentum
  • GANE Insight
    • GANE Insight Blog

GANE Insight: Kim Jorgensen Gane's Blog

I'm no longer directionally challenged--I have a clear vision to celebrate #MOREin2014 via GANEPossible.com. Preempting my novel in progress, Bluebirds, I'm very close to releasing my first GANE Possible publication (prescriptive "Dr. Mom" nonfiction), Beating the Statistics: A Mother's Quest to Reclaim Fertility, Halt Autism & Help Her Child Grow From Behavior Failure to Behavior Success. I'm also working on completing my memoir, My Grandfather's Table: Learning to Forgive Myself First.

It took a lifetime to get here. This blog documents my quest to self-fulfillment through my writing, and ultimately to shifting my focus to Beating the Statistics & My Grandfather's Table and speaking about them. They are the wellness and the memoir parts of my journey that had to be told, so that Bluebirds can one day be the meaningful, but fictional *story* it aspires to be.

Follow Kim on Facebook

The Beauty of A Woman Blog Fest:  The Beauty of Women Friends

2/21/2013

32 Comments

 
Picture
August McLaughlin's Beauty of a Woman Blog Fest 2013
My mind is occupied with things that aren’t so beautiful.  Things like cancer.  Things like my second close friend in six months undergoing the knife to remove a piece of her that I imagine, as we all have, she’s grown accustomed to looking down at from time to time.  Certainly she’s been painfully aware of its presence recently, if she didn't pay it much mind before.

Her husband sits in a waiting room with his father and sister, not seeing the phone before him, hearing perhaps a ticking clock nearby, snippets of hushed whispers.

Her children sit in their respective classrooms, not hearing their teachers.  Wondering, worrying, and not quite understanding what their mother is going through, or perhaps even where she is.

I sit looking at this glowing white page, with words coming and then escaping me; too fleeting to capture most of them.  And I wait.  I’m not there.  I feel helpless.  The snow blows outside my window.  And I wait. 

Picture
An army of supporters waits with them, each of us going about our own lives.  I am writing this post, because I agreed to do it, and because there is nothing more beautiful than a woman mothering through her pain.  There is nothing more beautiful than a wife who is there for her husband for all the moments before and all the ones after a traitorous piece of her is cut away.  There is nothing more beautiful than a woman who comforts and cries with and prays with her children and reassures them, even as she reassures herself, that everything will be OK.

I was still living in California when my first close friend underwent the same surgery, double, that my friend today must endure; must survive; must press on through for all the days that follow.  I can’t fathom what might be beautiful about those days in between—only perhaps the other side.  After the scars begin to fade, and the hair grows, and the beauty and blessing of mothering lives once again in her children’s classrooms, reading and making crafts, and checking papers, instead of mired in each moments’ survival. 

My job will be to find ways to help make some of those days beautiful for my friend and her family, even as I continue to be the mom, the wife, the writer and businesswoman I’ve come to expect myself to be. 

Now that I’m back home where I belong, the beauty of my dear friends, all of us different ages, but with children the same age; changed on the surface and deep inside though we have in two short years, is that we’re still here.  Even if we can’t comprehend the choices, or fully appreciate the experience without having had it ourselves, we’re still here and we’re still friends.  We still have each other's backs, and we still hold one another's families in our hearts and in our care when one of us is down.

My friends, my posse, still forgive clumsily chosen words; we still vote for and cheer one another on, hold each other up and help each other succeed.  We still give the benefit of doubt in most cases, and accept apologies when offered.  We hope for only the best in life for our friends, and we’re there to help them survive, overcome and learn from the all too common snag, or plod through a monumentally difficult time. 

And through two years in California I made new and equally beautiful friends that now span the country, and who will remain so forever.  And through this process of releasing my inner author and sharing my soul with *the world*, I’ve made a myriad more friends across tundra and oceans.

Whether an instant of soaring brilliance, or in the worst of life’s moments—even if it’s spent unproductively, staring at a blank page, and praying like I’ve never prayed before, for mercy, for deft hands, for beauty and grace, and for another day to hug my friend, gently, or just to be there if she can’t stand my touch, even if it’s not a particularly beautiful day—there is no place I would rather be than among these beautiful women who became my friends through a MOMS Club playgroup.  We’ve seen children born and children married, and we’ve watched our brood of fifteen kids grow through everything in between. 

This week reminds me what is beautiful about being a woman that has nothing to do with weight or height or skin or hair or breasts; and none of it is more striking than the beauty of women friends. 

[And what a difference 48 hours makes.  Update: my friend came through her surgery bravely and valiantly, and so did her family, and so did I.  Amazingly, she came home the next day.  She is where she belongs, recovering with her family and friends surrounding her.  And my first friend gave us all hope when she received news recently, as her hair begins to grow back, that her doctor considers her in remission.  On to the next step:  Fight like a Girl, my beautiful friends!  Fight like a Girl!]

Thank you to August McLaughlin for inviting me to participate in her second annual Beauty of a Woman Blog Fest.  Please check out what are sure to be more fantastic posts over on August's page, where she'll be linking up a bunch of us to celebrate the beauty of women tomorrow, February 22, 2013.


This post that I wrote quite feverishly the afternoon that I was waiting to hear about my friend's surgery absolutely suits the spirit of @HeatheroftheEO 's #JustWrite exercise over at Extraordinary Ordinary.  It's all about capturing moments.  Happy ones, heart wrenching ones, poignantly beautiful ones...those that give you pause, that make you notice life and appreciate all it has to offer, the good and the bad.  It's one of the best writing exercises I've participated in, and I highly recommend it.  Be sure to follow the directions, because that's what makes it ROCK so beautifully.  
32 Comments
Ellen M. Gregg link
2/21/2013 07:21:03 am

Beautiful post, Kim. I'm glad to know your friend is home to heal and recover. That is great news!

My Ya-Yas and my Compass group are beautiful far above and beyond the scope of appearance. They may be physically attractive, but what truly makes them beautiful is how they act; who they are inside. It rises to the surface and they glow with that beauty. It's divine.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
2/21/2013 08:12:18 am

I know exactly what you mean, Ellen. Women friends are divine, indeed! And thanks so much for visiting and commenting on my little blog.

Reply
August McLaughlin link
2/21/2013 08:46:00 am

Kim, I have chills! Thank you for this lovely post, and for being the beautiful woman, artist and friend you are. I'm so happy to hear that your fiend's surgery went well. Please give her a huge BOAW hug and cheers from all of us!

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
2/21/2013 09:56:48 am

August! I'm so grateful you stopped by today, and deeply touched by your good wishes for my friend. I've passed them on. Can't wait to read all the great posts tomorrow for this awesome event! I'm sure there will be lots of tissues, lots of laughs, and lots of coffee involved! Heck, it may even go on into the wine hours!

Reply
Kathryn link
2/22/2013 04:39:59 am

I, too, have chills after reading this post. What wonder it is to have friendships that can endure anything. I have some of those, and lost some friendships with my illness. The ones that have hung with me and the new ones I met because of the illness are something to be cherished and treasured.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
2/22/2013 03:14:44 pm

Kathryn, I'm sorry you've had an illness that tested your friendships, but it often seems it is through some difficulty that we find out who our true friends are. The important thing is that we're lucky enough to have any at all. I hope you are well, and thanks so much for visiting.

Reply
Catherine Johnson link
2/22/2013 04:41:32 am

I love'the beauty of women friends' what would we do without them? :0)

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
2/22/2013 03:27:13 pm

I sure don't know what I would do without mine! Thank you for taking the time to read & comment, Catherine.

Reply
Lainey
2/22/2013 09:00:33 am

Kim~ I have a lump in my throat. My prayers for you and your friends. Beautiful amazing fantastical piece, as always. I LOVE reading your work and I love you! Your my inspiration, your Lainey xoxo

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
2/22/2013 09:45:13 am

Aww, Lainey!! One of my forever CA friends! Thanks so much for your good wishes, and for visiting. Love you back!

Reply
Sabrina Garie link
2/22/2013 10:50:21 am

So true, Kim, that the beauty of friendship can get us through the toughest challenges. Glad you have such a strong group around you. Thanks for sharing.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
2/22/2013 03:29:29 pm

SO am I, Sabrina! Thanks so much for visiting.

Reply
Renee Schuls-Jacobson link
2/22/2013 02:42:33 pm

This is so lovely. I feel blessed to have a small but close posse of friends with whom I can share anything. Like you, illness has been rough for a few years -- but we have supported each other, baking loaves of challah (loaves of love) for each other. I think friendships like the ones you describe are the greatest blessing - and truly one of the most beautiful things one can know on this life. Not everyone has that kind of support. Consider yourself blessed.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
2/22/2013 03:34:48 pm

Renee, we are indeed blessed to have our posses, online as well as in real life. What a lovely tradition, baking loaves of challah for one another. I was always grateful for my friends before I moved away, but that definitely caused me to appreciate them more.

Reply
Julie Glover link
2/23/2013 12:56:48 am

This was so beautiful. I have been through those moments of friends (and my mother) going through breast cancer treatment, and I agree that their beauty shone through in our friendship and their courage. I love your take on this. I pray for your friends to continue healing.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/5/2013 02:03:33 am

Julie! So sorry I'm late in my replies, but I'm so grateful to all the fellow BOAW bloggers who visited and commented, you included. I'm still visiting some of the posts, as I ran into a couple of really busy weeks, but it's kind of awesome to keep the glow going. I hope your friends and your mother are all well on the path to healing.

Reply
Jennifer M Zeiger link
2/23/2013 11:17:08 am

Well said. The support of friends through such hard times makes this world all the more beautiful in a bittersweet kind of way. Thanks for sharing. Prayers for healing=)

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/5/2013 02:04:58 am

Thank you so much for the prayers, Jennifer, and thank you so much for visiting.

Reply
Kerry Ann link
2/23/2013 11:54:38 am

Oh, I was just so happy to read your brief post script—I'm so glad to hear how your friends made through! You are so right. There is nothing more beautiful that to be graced with true friendship. Wonderful piece. Thank you so much for sharing. Cheers to you and your possee.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/5/2013 02:06:05 am

Kerry Ann, I was so very happy to report it! Thanks so much for your good wishes and for visiting.

Reply
Kourtney link
2/25/2013 02:46:55 am

Wow. I felt like I was right there with your friend's family. What a terrible thing to go through, but you captured it so eloquently. I am glad to hear she is home recovering with her family now.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/5/2013 02:22:59 am

Thank you, Kourtney. Some of the best most poignant moments in life are so meaningful to capture in these brief (for me, this was a short one!) pieces. @HeatheroftheEO has a brilliant #JustWrite exercise she does weekly, over on Extraordinary-Ordinary.net. I highly recommend it.

Reply
Jess Witkins link
2/25/2013 06:11:42 am

I don't know what I'd do without women friends! There was a time where all mine moved away after college and I felt left behind, but then I ended up making a new friend and she's THE BESTEST I could ask for. I'm so grateful.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/15/2013 02:23:50 pm

We all need a bestest of the best. Missing my posse of women friends and family so desperately when I moved to San Diego is how I finally began writing after squashing it for 45 years. So glad to be home, but I'm also so very glad that I had the little kick in the pants I needed.

Reply
Rebekah Loper link
2/25/2013 10:05:38 am

So glad both of your friends are doing well currently! Women-friends are indeed some of the most beautiful things in life!

Reply
Shelly
2/25/2013 12:55:10 pm

Kim,
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for this heart warming piece. It is crazy that 2 out of 5 of our posse are going through this at the same time in our 30's! I will always be extremely grateful for the lifelong friendships we have made! I appreciate all the nice comments from everyone, step one of many in this battle is behind me.....

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/15/2013 02:29:32 pm

Aww, Shel. I don't know what I would have done without you guys when I was in SD! So glad I'm back for you both, for this, for everything. And I'm so grateful for all the beautiful comments, too. Reading them all again...just wow. Looking forward now...we got this. <3

Reply
Sally link
2/27/2013 02:41:04 pm

I love your line, "There is nothing more beautiful than a woman mothering through her pain." It is so true. I've seen friends mother gracefully and lovingly even as their marriages fall apart, their parents die, their bodies betray them. And yet the singular focus remains to protect and parent their children. It is awe inspiring.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/15/2013 02:31:43 pm

Thank you, Sally, and so very true that as mothers we all have to do that through a variety of difficulties. Awe inspiring, indeed.

Reply
Inion N. Mathair link
3/1/2013 09:22:25 am

Kim, I can't tell you what this post did for us. What I can tell you, is that we lost four of our family members to Cancer, all within a very short time. We have been trying to get to all of the Beauty of a Woman Blogfest posts, and I'm glad that we didn't stop. After reading yours, I have to say, it is by far my favorite. I finished it thru the tears and with understanding of loving someone so that your there in any way that will be a strength for them. My favorite part was when you said, "or be there if she can't stand my touch." Someone that knows what means to be a friend. To love unconditionally. Your friends are beautiful women, but then so are you my dear! God Bless You and your beautiful friend. It has been a priviledge to read this. Thank you.

Reply
Kim Jorgensen Gane link
3/15/2013 02:35:17 pm

Inion & Mathair! Thank you so much for your beautiful comment, and your thoughts and I'm deeply sorry to read that you've both lost so many. I, too, have been waylaid in reading and responding, but reading yours again after reading it before in my e-mail, touches me deeply again. Thank you so much for your good wishes for me and for my friends. God bless both of you.

Reply
Natural Breast Enlargement Cream link
10/25/2013 11:46:19 pm

This blog made me your crazy follower. I am deeply impressed by your work and therefore adding you in my favorite list so that next time I could read you again.

Reply



Leave a Reply.

    Write2TheEnd | 

    Kim Jorgensen Gane

    Author|Award-Winning Essayist|Freelance CommercialWriter|GANE
    Empowered Wellness Advocate, Facilitator, Speaker

    Kim is a freelance writer, living and working on Michigan’s sunset coast with her husband, youngest son, a standard poodle and a gecko. She’s been every-mom, raising two generations of kids over twenty-seven years. Kim writes on a variety of topics including parenting  through midlife crisis, infertility, health and wellness, personal empowerment, politics, and about anything else that interests her, including flash fiction and her novel in progress, Bluebirds.  Oh, and this happened!

    Kim was selected as a BlogHer '13 Voices of the Year Honoree in the Op Ed category for this post, an excerpt of which has been adapted for inclusion in the book, 51%: Women and the Future of Politics, to be released late 2014.  Visit her Wordpress About page to see her CV.
    View my profile on LinkedIn
    BlogHer '13 Voices of the Year Community Keynote Honoree
    Picture
    Creative Commons License
    This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.
    Picture

    Subscribing is sexy, and may be fortuitous!

    Join our list!

    * indicates required
    Email Format

    Archives

    April 2015
    November 2014
    August 2014
    May 2014
    April 2014
    January 2014
    November 2013
    October 2013
    September 2013
    August 2013
    July 2013
    June 2013
    March 2013
    February 2013
    January 2013
    December 2012
    November 2012
    August 2012
    July 2012
    June 2012
    May 2012
    April 2012
    March 2012

    Featured on BlogHer.com

    Categories

    All
    2013
    2014
    911
    Abortion
    Add
    Adolescence
    Adoption
    Amanda Bynes
    Amtrak
    #AmtrakResidency
    #amwriting
    Amy Jo Burns
    Ann Imig
    A Novel
    Anthology
    Asperger's
    August Mclaughlin
    Author
    Autism
    Ava Chin
    #BacktoSchool
    Back To School
    Beauty Of A Woman Blog Fest
    Benton Harbor
    Bigotry
    Blended Families
    Blended Family
    Blogging
    Blogher
    #BlogHer13
    BlogHer '13
    Blog Hop
    Bluebirds
    Books
    Brain Health
    Breast Cancer
    Brownies
    Budget
    Bully
    Bullying
    Challenge
    Change
    Children
    Children With Disabilities
    Choice
    Choices
    Christmas
    Cinderland
    Costume
    Crackbook
    Ct
    Cyber Bullying
    Cyber Friends
    Dairy Free
    Destiny
    #DF
    Discrimination
    Disney
    Diy
    Dog Puke
    Dr. Lissa Rankin
    Eating Wildly
    E Books
    E-books
    Education
    Empowerment
    Empty Nest
    Endometriosis
    Enlightened Middle
    Exercise
    Facebook
    Face To Face
    Face-to-face
    Fall
    Family
    Fear
    Featured
    Feminism
    Fertility
    Festive
    Fifty Shades
    Flash Fiction
    Flash! Friday
    Friends
    Galit Breen
    Gane Possible
    Generation Fabulous
    #GF
    Girlfriends
    Giveaway
    #Giveaway
    Gluten Free
    Glutennazimom
    Google+
    Government
    Government Shut Down
    Grief
    Guy Kawasaki
    Halloween
    Handmade
    Haven
    Heal Healthcare Now
    Health
    Hepatitis B
    Hepb
    Hillary Clinton
    Holidays
    Holistic
    Homework
    Hope
    Humblebrag
    Humblebraggart
    Humblebragging
    Humor
    Immunization
    Income
    Infertility
    #Infertility
    Influencer
    #ItGetsBetter
    It Gets Better
    Jim Denney
    Judy Blume
    #JudyBlumeProject
    Judy Blume Project
    #JustWrite
    Just Write
    @KimGANEPossible
    Kim Jorgensen Gane
    Kim Singing
    #KindnessWins
    Language
    Laura Munson
    Lean In
    Life
    Lindsay Lohan
    Listen To Your Mother
    Local
    Low Cost
    #LTYM
    Math Facts
    Md
    Mental Health
    Michigan
    Midlife
    #MidlifeBlvd
    Midterm Elections
    Miley Cyrus
    Mind Over Medicine
    Mom
    Montana
    Mother
    Mothering
    Moving
    Nablopomo
    Newton Ct
    Obama
    Obamacare
    Online
    Oprah
    #OwnBossy
    Parenting
    Patty Chang Anker
    Pcos
    Peg Fitzpatrick
    Pinterest
    Platform
    Poem
    Poetry
    Politics
    Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome
    Popular Media
    Poverty
    President
    Progress
    Puberty
    QueenLatifah.com
    Racism
    Rain
    Reading
    Reality Tv
    Recipe
    Reclaim Your Fertility
    Religion
    Reproductive Rights
    Retreat
    Review
    Ruth Curran
    #SABD13
    Sahm
    San Diego
    Santa
    School
    Self Discipline
    Self-Discipline
    Self Esteem
    Sex
    Sheryl Sandberg
    Simplifying
    #SingleMom
    Single Mom
    Single Parenting
    Social Media
    #SomeNerve
    Some Nerve
    Soup
    Southwest
    Southwest Michigan
    Spring Forward
    Stay At Home Moms
    #StepMom
    Step Parenting
    Step-parenting
    Submission
    Suicide
    #SuicidePrevention
    Suicide Prevention
    Support
    Tablet
    Tea Party
    Technology
    Thanksgiving
    The Bachelor
    The Book Thief
    The Hunger Games
    This Is Not The Story You Think It Is
    Thrift
    Timebenders
    Time Change
    Time Warp Tuesday
    Train
    Twitter
    Unexposed Talent
    Vaccination
    Vmas
    War On Women
    Waxing
    Whitefish
    Women
    Workshop
    #Write2TheEnd
    Writers
    Writers Workshop
    Writing

    RSS Feed

*GANEPossible.com is an anecdotal website and in no way intends to diagnose, treat, prevent or otherwise influence the medical decisions of its readers. I am not a doctor, I do not recommend going off prescribed medications without the advice and approval of a qualified practitioner, and I do not recommend changing your diet or your exercise routine without first consulting your doctor. These are merely my life experiences, and what has and hasn't worked for me and my family. You must be your own best medical advocate and that of your children, and seek to find the practitioner with whom you have the best rapport and in whose advice and care you can entrust your health and medical decisions.


Mailing Address:
420 Main Street, Suite A
St. Joseph, MI  49085
Please email to schedule a consultation,
Hours by appointment:
kjgane(@)ganepossible(.)com

I Blog with Integrity, please treat my content with integrity: Copyright © 2020, Kimberly Jorgensen Gane, This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License..