Today, September 10, 2014, the World Health Organization and the International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP) co-sponsors World Suicide Prevention Day. To commemorate this day, the MSW@USC invites you to participate in the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention campaign. Around the world, suicide is a major public health problem and is the leading cause of death for young people. Worldwide, nearly one million people succumb to suicide each year, a number that exceeds deaths from war and homicide combined. This year marks the 12th anniversary of World Suicide Prevention Day with the theme “One World Connected.” In honor of National Suicide Prevention Week, we hope you’ll participate in as many of these #suicideprevention events as you can. 

Last year, I participated in the National Suicide Prevention Blog Carnival with the written version of my post, What If I'd Said, "Just Drive?" This year, I stepped on a stage with my fellow cast members in NW Indiana to read that same piece before a living, breathing audience for Listen to Your Mother 2014. Many of the five years of Listen to Your Mother videos deal with topics of depression, including single parenting, postpartum and suicide, with common themes of survival and hope threaded throughout, because, let's face it, as wonderful as it often is, motherhood can be hard. It can also be tears-streaming-down-your-face hilarious, as evidenced by Liesl Testwuide of Hairpin Turns Ahead and Robyn Jackson Welling of Hollow Tree Ventures reading two of my favorites. I watch them whenever I need a laugh. Many days I've sought the laughter these delightful women inspire, especially after our collective laughter stopped recently when Robin Williams lost his battle with depression, and took his own life. Don't let that happen to you. Seek and celebrate the laughter, reach out, and if you're a survivor like me, I hope you'll get involved. 

For this special day of awareness and action, and for single moms everywhere, here's my video:

I find solace in my children. I find solace in getting involved in, advocating, and celebrating my local community. I find solace in reaching out and not being alone. There are many ways you can participate in what's left of today, this week, and the rest of this month. I love the #TheSemiColonProject, because it's geared to writers. This post by Denise Drespling explaining what the semi-colon means. And Denise has some great strategies for mental health wellness in her video on today's post. Follow along and Tweet your semi-colon, real or Sharpied. 

Here's mine:

National Suicide Prevention Week Schedule of Events:

Sunday, September 7, 7pm PT/10pm ET: MSW@USC’s community manager @GabyAcosta101 will serve as a special guest on the Suicide Prevention Social Media Twitter Chat #SPSM. Join her for a conversation about how we can leverage new media and virtual campaigns to raise awareness around Suicide Prevention. 

Monday, September 8: Today is the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention Kick-off! Over 45 leading voices in the suicide prevention field have contributed guest posts, podcast interviews, PSA’s, and resources to help raise awareness in honor of Suicide Prevention and Awareness Month. We ask that you share this project to help promote the work that our collaborators are doing to prevent suicide in their communities. 

Tuesday, September 9: Check out the “You Matter” project. This early-intervention campaign aims to to facilitate human connections in order to promote positive mental health. According to the IASP, connectedness is crucial to individuals who may be vulnerable to suicide. Studies have shown that social isolation can increase the risk of suicide and, conversely, that having strong human bonds can be protective against it. Reaching out to those who have become disconnected from others and offering them support and friendship may be a life-saving act.

Wednesday, September 10: Today is World Suicide Prevention Day! Follow the International Association of Suicide Prevention on Facebook for updates on their WSPD events.

Thursday, September 11, 6pm PT/9pm ET: @MSWatUSC will be moderating the #MacroSW tweet chat to discuss ways we can synchronize suicide prevention efforts between individuals and organizations around the country. RSVP for this event here.

Friday, September 12: Join us for a #NSPW Follow Friday! Tweet and mention individuals and organizations who you want to recognize as leaders in #suicideprevention and awareness advocacy work.

Spread the Word On Social Media:

For Collaborators:

Sample Tweet: I’m joining @MSWatUSC & 45+ experts for the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention campaign. Read my post here: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW

Sample Facebook Post: I’m joining over 45 experts in the field and USC School of Social Work for the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention campaign. Check out my submission here: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW


For Advocates:

Sample Tweet: @MSWatUSC joins together w/ 45+ experts for the 100 Voices for #SuicidePrevention campaign. Read Now: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW
            
Sample Facebook Post: “USC School of Social Work has built a collaboration with over 45 leading voices in the suicide prevention field who have contributed guest posts, podcast interviews, PSA’s, and resources. Share the 100 Voices Campaign to raise awareness for this critical issue: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW

Keep the suicide prevention and awareness conversation going on social media using the following hashtags: #suicideprevention #NSPW #stayalive #youarenotalone #itgetsbetter #saynotosuicide #stopsuicide #unsuicide #twloha #loveislouder

Thank you for raising awareness with us!  

If you or a friend are considering suicide please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. It is free and confidential.

There's a reason I hadn't written a new post on my *other* site since the beginning of the school year when my stomach was in knots over my food sensitive kid's first male teacher (he's doing fine, btw).   A number of things have occurred since, which left me ambivalent about continuing with a gluten-free site at all (especially with one called GlutenNaziMom). 

After almost two years blogging, today I received my first hate comments.

I was advised having such a brand would take some special care, but that there were ways around it.  It was catchy.  It worked for Seinfeld.  When my son was born and I had teenaged daughters in the house, Seinfeld was still a part of our social landscape.  I have to wonder now if social media would have put a stop to the running SoupNazi skit from it's first airing.  Instead, it became a part of nearly everyday language in our house, and in many houses across America.

I had teenagers making PB&Js, macaroni and cheese, frozen pizzas, all while I was trying to navigate life with a newborn.  The puzzle of figuring out what made him uncomfortable, difficult to please, aka, "high needs," combined with the risk of cross-contamination when I was still learning and trying to catch my bearings did make me a GlutenNaziMom.

Seinfeld, however, I am not.  

My son took six years to get here.  I believe that was because of food allergies.  My husband had colitis bordering on Crohn's Disease, I had PCOS and endometriosis and wicked seasonal allergies.  There are reasons our reproductive systems shut down first.  And yes, I believe our food system has a lot to do with why infertility is still rising meteorically.  So I was.  I was a GlutenNaziMom.  Crazed in my efforts to try to get some damn sleep, more than a 20-30 minute catnap at a stretch out of my newborn, which was barely long enough to take a real shower with hair washing and leg shaving and the whole zen peace and solitude thing.

It was a name my teenagers gave me.  It was our effort to find humor in a difficult situation.  It was an effort to laugh at life even when my feelings were hurt.  Even when I had to stand and rock a thirteen-month-old for hours in the middle of the night because otherwise he was screaming, I could only assume, in pain because I'd inadvertently eaten something wrong, possibly the size of a crumb.  It was the way our family, and a whole lot of families that deal with one "food-allergic" kid in the house, try to get through it all from one day to the next.  

It was about vigilance in order to survive our stressful days.  Writing about our struggles and trying to help others was my way of eeking some good out of an often difficult situation.  Would I have traded my son, who took six years to be, for any of it?  Of course not.  But that didn't change the fact that it was a roller coaster more often than not.

When we know better, we do better.  

In mid-2013, I became associated with a remarkable group of midlife women bloggers, several of whom have heritage deeply entwined in and forever affected by Jewish history.  Were any of these remarkable, insightful, supportive women people I wanted to hurt in any way?  Is anti-semitism something I want to contribute to in any way?  My God, no.  

My friend Sharon Greenthal, founding co-editor of the site, Midlife Boulevard, wrote a post on her blog, Empty House Full Mind, which gave me pause (as did the Sunday Review piece which inspired her post, "The Banality of Robbing the Jews").  My own piece and the frustration and fear I expressed back when school began also gave me pause.  I felt ensconced in a ten-year-old (47-year-old?) defeatist attitude.  I don't want to be banal about or laugh at something so painful for millions of people, and I don't want to rob anyone of their things, their dignity, or simply their otherwise peaceful day.  Though I don't think the commenter is someone familiar with peace.

And I was tired.  

And my son is ten.  He often chooses and prepares food for himself these days.  Everyday he shows me that he's becoming more and more his own man.  And what am I discovering?  That remarkably, my son embraces an attitude of, "that's gluten free?  You mean I can try that," versus, "Whoa-is-me, I can't eat anything!"  

The truth is, because our grocery cart and thus our crisper drawers are always full of good things, because the meals we prepare at home are chock full of items from the produce aisle and contain far fewer boxed and prepared processed foods than many typical American ten-year-olds might encounter on a regular basis, my son recognizes that the world is full of an abundance of foods he can eat--Variety and Vegetables.  I did that.  My grandfather, who lived to be 100, and my mother did that.  I did that for my daughter even when I was a single mom.  It's a legacy my family has passed down which does something pretty magical:  It keeps us well.

That's the gold.  That's what is unique and special about my family and how we approach the fact that we happen, now that my daughters are grown women in charge of their own households, to be a gluten-free one.  And I can embrace the positive.  I can forgive myself for my prior process of scarcity, blame, fear, to embrace a new philosophy of #MOREin2014.

The truth is, crunchy and militant isn't for everyone.  We all have our own struggles and stresses and we have to choose the battles that make sense for our families.  If more of us just do a little better, become a little more aware, it has the power to be far more impactful than a handful of crunchy people waving signs around.

And I'd much rather be a part of a positive movement than cause someone to viscerally recall such a negative, hurtful, devastating moment in the collective history of our humanity.  

A year ago, I didn't have a clue what I would do if I weren't defined by GlutenNaziMom.  If I weren't locked in the baggage of life's difficult moments, what could I do?  What could I be?  It's taken me this year to process.  With some pretty intense coaching from Nancy Kaye, of Define Your Destiny, and the best piece of advice she gave me--CLAIM YOUR WORTH!  There is NO REASON on Earth You Don't Deserve Success and Happiness--it took me all of 2013 to grow and embrace all that my life is, versus all that's maybe a wee bit difficult about it.  And to roll with the punches, to keep on keepin' on, even in the face of nastiness.

I thank the commenter who provided the impetus I needed to take the step I was having a hard time committing to—I’ve taken down the site.

I'm a work in progress.  When we know better, we do better.  I'm still here.  And I surrender.  

Letting go of scarcity to embrace my grandfather's and my brilliant and beautiful son's attitude of abundance feels pretty damn great.  And I'm just a little proud of my part in getting him, getting us, there. 


NOTE:  This post was written (meh, a couple days late to the party, albeit a very timely topic) as part of a #MidlifeBlvd bloghop.  One thing I know about these ladies?  There will be a plethora of hugely valuable best advice and information they ever received.  I hope you'll read through some of the other posts.