Today, September 10, 2014, the World Health Organization and the International Association for Suicide Prevention (IASP) co-sponsors World Suicide Prevention Day. To commemorate this day, the MSW@USC invites you to participate in the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention campaign. Around the world, suicide is a major public health problem and is the leading cause of death for young people. Worldwide, nearly one million people succumb to suicide each year, a number that exceeds deaths from war and homicide combined. This year marks the 12th anniversary of World Suicide Prevention Day with the theme “One World Connected.” In honor of National Suicide Prevention Week, we hope you’ll participate in as many of these #suicideprevention events as you can. 

Last year, I participated in the National Suicide Prevention Blog Carnival with the written version of my post, What If I'd Said, "Just Drive?" This year, I stepped on a stage with my fellow cast members in NW Indiana to read that same piece before a living, breathing audience for Listen to Your Mother 2014. Many of the five years of Listen to Your Mother videos deal with topics of depression, including single parenting, postpartum and suicide, with common themes of survival and hope threaded throughout, because, let's face it, as wonderful as it often is, motherhood can be hard. It can also be tears-streaming-down-your-face hilarious, as evidenced by Liesl Testwuide of Hairpin Turns Ahead and Robyn Jackson Welling of Hollow Tree Ventures reading two of my favorites. I watch them whenever I need a laugh. Many days I've sought the laughter these delightful women inspire, especially after our collective laughter stopped recently when Robin Williams lost his battle with depression, and took his own life. Don't let that happen to you. Seek and celebrate the laughter, reach out, and if you're a survivor like me, I hope you'll get involved. 

For this special day of awareness and action, and for single moms everywhere, here's my video:

I find solace in my children. I find solace in getting involved in, advocating, and celebrating my local community. I find solace in reaching out and not being alone. There are many ways you can participate in what's left of today, this week, and the rest of this month. I love the #TheSemiColonProject, because it's geared to writers. This post by Denise Drespling explaining what the semi-colon means. And Denise has some great strategies for mental health wellness in her video on today's post. Follow along and Tweet your semi-colon, real or Sharpied. 

Here's mine:

National Suicide Prevention Week Schedule of Events:

Sunday, September 7, 7pm PT/10pm ET: MSW@USC’s community manager @GabyAcosta101 will serve as a special guest on the Suicide Prevention Social Media Twitter Chat #SPSM. Join her for a conversation about how we can leverage new media and virtual campaigns to raise awareness around Suicide Prevention. 

Monday, September 8: Today is the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention Kick-off! Over 45 leading voices in the suicide prevention field have contributed guest posts, podcast interviews, PSA’s, and resources to help raise awareness in honor of Suicide Prevention and Awareness Month. We ask that you share this project to help promote the work that our collaborators are doing to prevent suicide in their communities. 

Tuesday, September 9: Check out the “You Matter” project. This early-intervention campaign aims to to facilitate human connections in order to promote positive mental health. According to the IASP, connectedness is crucial to individuals who may be vulnerable to suicide. Studies have shown that social isolation can increase the risk of suicide and, conversely, that having strong human bonds can be protective against it. Reaching out to those who have become disconnected from others and offering them support and friendship may be a life-saving act.

Wednesday, September 10: Today is World Suicide Prevention Day! Follow the International Association of Suicide Prevention on Facebook for updates on their WSPD events.

Thursday, September 11, 6pm PT/9pm ET: @MSWatUSC will be moderating the #MacroSW tweet chat to discuss ways we can synchronize suicide prevention efforts between individuals and organizations around the country. RSVP for this event here.

Friday, September 12: Join us for a #NSPW Follow Friday! Tweet and mention individuals and organizations who you want to recognize as leaders in #suicideprevention and awareness advocacy work.

Spread the Word On Social Media:

For Collaborators:

Sample Tweet: I’m joining @MSWatUSC & 45+ experts for the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention campaign. Read my post here: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW

Sample Facebook Post: I’m joining over 45 experts in the field and USC School of Social Work for the 100 Voices for Suicide Prevention campaign. Check out my submission here: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW


For Advocates:

Sample Tweet: @MSWatUSC joins together w/ 45+ experts for the 100 Voices for #SuicidePrevention campaign. Read Now: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW
            
Sample Facebook Post: “USC School of Social Work has built a collaboration with over 45 leading voices in the suicide prevention field who have contributed guest posts, podcast interviews, PSA’s, and resources. Share the 100 Voices Campaign to raise awareness for this critical issue: http://bit.ly/100Voices #NSPW

Keep the suicide prevention and awareness conversation going on social media using the following hashtags: #suicideprevention #NSPW #stayalive #youarenotalone #itgetsbetter #saynotosuicide #stopsuicide #unsuicide #twloha #loveislouder

Thank you for raising awareness with us!  

If you or a friend are considering suicide please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. It is free and confidential.

Maybe I’m weird, but I love most veggies, and I’m passionate about making them taste good to everyone. If you haven’t already, making your own dressings and marinades is a great way to embrace vegetables. It’s super easy, you can make them taste however you like, and you avoid unsavory ingredients, like MSG and preservatives, found in many “over the counter” dressings. Why embrace vegetables? Because they represent an absolutely necessary whole, clean source of micronutrients, including antioxidants, vitamins, minerals, phytochemicals, and trace elements the Standard American Diet (SAD!) commonly lacks. 

Learning to love them and setting a positive example for our kids is a key component to helping our families achieve and maintain overall wellness—especially important for kids as their bodies are building and growing. Fake foods simply don’t fuel that growth at the cellular level. 

I could easily eat spinach for every meal, no lie, breakfast included.  Not recommended for a  #MOREin2014 lifestyle that encourages VARIETY, first and foremost, but I’d be in my own crazy kinda Heaven. Kale I’m still learning to love—it’s a texture thing. Cut the leaves in a chiffonade (remove ribs, stack leaves, roll them into a tube and slice perpendicular to the length of the tube into narrow ribbons), however, and massage this delicious dressing thoroughly into them to help break down the fibers, and I bet it would be delicious. I’ll have to try it. Maybe tomorrow. Right now “I needs to eats me spinach! Toot-toot!”

<--This spinach is sautéed, but I equally enjoy a breakfast salad. Just look at that beautiful farm-fresh egg with its vibrant yolk! 

What you will need:

1 Tablespoon Dijon mustard

1 Tablespoon Honey, preferably raw & local

Salt/pepper to taste

¼ cup balsamic vinegar

Extra virgin olive oil in a vessel that allows for drizzling

Place all but the olive oil in the bottom of either your immersion blender measuring and mixing container or a regular blender. You might want to double this recipe for a regular blender. And I would start with a few grinds of fresh cracked pepper and ¼ teaspoon salt, you can add more later if you like. Blend these ingredients together, then keep the blender going and sslllooowwwly drizzle in olive oil. Once you’ve added between a quarter- and a half-cup, turn off the motor, allow it to come to a complete stop, taste to adjust for balance of acidity with your particular vinegar (some are more tart and acidic in flavor than others) and your own taste. Keep whizzing and slowly drizzle in more olive oil if needed. Too bland? Add a spash more vinegar, maybe a pinch more salt and pepper.

My favorite kitchen tool is an immersion blender. It makes me feel like anything is possible. With it, I blend soups right in the pot and I make a number of delicious dressings and marinades. 

You can perform any of these tasks in a regular blender, but an immersion blender feels so much "chef-ier!" If you're using a regular blender for this recipe, you'll need one with a removable center port in the lid for drizzling, which is important for proper emulsification. It may work best to make a double recipe if you’re using a regular blender, which is great to do anyway. This is delicious thinned down a bit more and used as salad dressing. 



What you will need:

1 Tablespoon Dijon mustard

1 clove garlic, sliced

Juice of one lemon

Salt/pepper to taste

Extra virgin olive oil in a container that allows for drizzling


To the bottom of your mixing vessel, add the Dijon mustard, the garlic, salt/pepper (start with a few grinds of pepper and ¼ tsp salt), and fresh-squeezed lemon juice. Blend these ingredients together, then keep the blender going and ssllloowwwwly drizzle in olive oil. Once you’ve added between a quarter- and  a half-cup, turn off the motor, allow it to come to a complete stop, taste to adjust for balance of acidity with your particular lemon (for instance, Meyer lemons are milder in flavor and less acidic) and your own taste buds.

I didn't expect speaking to the Smart Girls group at the Boys & Girls Club today to feel like I was the one receiving the gift of their time and attention, but it did. 

The girls were lovely. I enjoyed the girl talk (I do so miss my girls), and I especially enjoyed all the hugs I was the lucky recipient of at the end. I found it hard to leave.

To the Intelligent, Kind, Talented, Well-Mannered, Beautiful Young Ladies of Smart Girls: 

Thank you so much for having me today, and thank you for your sweet hugs. They made my day!

One of the things I hope you take with you after today is, of course, that anything is POSSIBLE. You each deserve to have the life you're willing to work for and dream of. Because we ALL deserve that. Don't ever let anybody tell you otherwise.
We all make mistakes. But a mistake doesn't have to define you for life. 

Every day that you wake up, throw off your covers and put your feet on the floor is another opportunity to make choices that keep you on your desired path in life. And you never know what beautiful, spectacular sights await you around the next corner. You matter. Your future matters. I couldn't wait to meet you all today, and I hope to see you again, because you matter to me. So just stay on the road. 

No one can force you to make the right choices. You have to want badly enough to do that for yourself. Sometimes we make the wrong choices out of spite. "I'll show them!" Right? We might manage to make someone else sad, but the only one you truly hurt is yourself. 

My parents divorced when I was a freshman in high school, and I've had five stepparents since then. My dad has been divorced four times, and my mom is married for the third time. I had a lot of anger for a long time. But the truth is, my parents' choices didn't have to have a negative effect on my choices. Only I allowed them to do that when I decided to stop believing in anything. And at 45 years old, I got tired of being angry, and I started doing what I wanted to do for me. 

You may not see a lot of diversity around you, or see yourself in many examples of success. But I want you to know that I didn't see examples of success I believed in for myself either, especially after I became a single mom--I thought my fate was sealed. 

I no longer believe that was EVER true. 

I didn't know other successful writers around me. So I took to the internet. I signed up for creative writing classes at the adult extension of the University of California in San Diego.

I started communicating with writers whose books I'd read, and I've met a few of them. That's what I needed to do. It made those writers feel more human to me. That showed me that if I'm willing to do the work, my dream of writing -- of finishing -- my own book someday IS possible. 

WE are the only ones with the power to limit ourselves. And we give up that power to others far too often.

Also, remember how we talked about letting love in--and I'm talking about true appreciation, kindness, and support of your dreams and goals kind of love. Even if you don't feel loved every day, wherever you come across it, like from the wonderful staff and volunteers at the Boys & Girls Club, drink it in and believe that.

You girls are capable of anything. If you can conceive it, you can achieve it if you just believe and keep it in your mind. Like Miss Brown says, "Always ask yourself, 'is this going to help me achieve my goals, or does this have the potential to send me sailing off that cliff?'" (OK, the cliff part I added.)

Choose yourself, choose YOUR future.  And be well.

Your new friend,
--Kim Jorgensen Gane

If you're lucky enough to be near Benton Harbor, MI, next week during their Clubs Week Celebration, please take the opportunity to tour the facilities of the Boys & Girls Club. "The interest and involvement by our community as a whole is critical to insuring the success of future generations." And the awesome kids there need and deserve your time and attention, too.  If you or someone else you know would enjoy taking a guided tour next week, please RSVP to the attention of Kimberly McCoy with your choice of day and the number of guests who wish to attend. 


(c) Copyright, 2014, All Rights Reserved

Does your family battled colds, flu, bronchitis, sinus infections, or other persistent maladies each season, despite what you’ve always thought was a healthier than average diet?

It’s no wonder we have the health problems we do in this country, when we are chronically misinformed about what it means to have a “healthy” diet, when we assault our immune systems with “whole grains,” such as wheat, wheat and more wheat, day in and day out. 

Did you grow up with the stack of “Wonderful” Bread on the table at dinner every evening, after you had a “Wonderful” Bread sandwich (likely made with processed bologna) in the lunch your mom lovingly packed for you, and likely after “Wonderful” Bread toast for breakfast?  That’s what I call “Stacking” (TM).  And even though we’ve perhaps graduated from “Wonderful” Bread-type products, many of us eat our “Wheatie-fuls” or a bagel for breakfast, think we’re doing something better than the local Burger Barn and get a “sub” for lunch, grab a soda and a crunchy Dorito-ey-licious snack mid-afternoon to battle the slump, and then go home to enjoy pasta with bread for dinner. 

I mean, YUM!  But WOW! 

Eating that way twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, nearly 365 days a year is extremely stressful (and/or over-stimulating) to the immune system, and can result in frequent bouts with allergies and seasonal illness—for my son, it was chronic croup that developed into mild asthma.  For me, over twelve years ago now, it was chronic sinus infections, yearly respiratory illness including bronchitis and progressive asthma, which resulted in a couple “Z-Pack” prescriptions per year, followed by dreaded yeast infections. 

For my husband, scarier, more progressive health issues persisted, exacerbated by the incredible job stress he was under.  As a former firefighter, likely with a compromised respiratory system because of it, the stakes were much higher.  He had two episodes of A-Fib (Atrial Fibrillation, which puts sufferers at a dramatically increased risk of stroke), and he battled walking pneumonia, often two to three bouts per season.  For him, the season seemed to start earlier and last longer year after year.    

Something my family discovered because we’re gluten free?  There's no difference if we’re assaulting our immune systems by “Stacking” with rice, rice and more rice.  Eating little in the way of fresh vegetables, not getting enough protein, and consuming tons of empty calories full of sugar and chemicals is a sure way to invite colds and flu to visit and revisit for the winter and to stay awhile.  Ahem.  If I fed myself as well as I feed my son, stopped skipping meals, got more sleep, reduced my portions, and got up from my computer for an hour each day, I’d manage to shrink my size.  Hmmm…it sounds so easy….

Weight alone, however, much to the befuddlement of the Dr. Ozes of the world, isn’t always a reliable indicator of wellness.  So for the purposes of this article, allow me to define wellness as getting through cold and flu season with no episodes of cold or flu, and NO antibiotics.  It is POSSIBLE, even if you aren’t considered ideal weight, and it’s something I’ve managed to avoid for over twelve years.  It's something my grandfather did for 100.  This is an idea I love, and one (knock on wood) we’ve managed to achieve thus far this season, my husband included.  This past winter was his second without walking pneumonia and without antibiotics. My son is ten-years-old and has been on antibiotics only once in his entire life.  That was during our first season in San Diego, when his body was likely adjusting to new and different regional pathogens.  Our family was under an incredible amount of stress with all the adjustments, which didn't help any of us, because stress has a chemical impact on our bodies.

I have discovered and incorporated some important dietary adjustments with my son, however resistant my husband remained to the same changes for himself (when I wasn’t watching).   So what do we do, what have we changed in order to achieve our definition of wellness?

Perhaps you’ve already gotten help that’s lead you to put your child on a gluten free diet, but it hasn’t exactly provided the magic solution you’d hoped for.  It's important to note that many of the gluten free swaps available are simply processed garbage of another sort.  They may not contain gluten, but they contain a variety of starches that offer very little in the way of good things (fiber, protein, essential nutrients) to put in the body, and they're often higher in sugar, fat, sodium, and empty calories to make up for what they lack in taste and texture. 

Whether or not your family needs to be gluten free, Clean Eating (as clean as you can manage and afford at least), whole foods and VARIETY are important components typically missing in the Standard American Diet (SAD) or in the Standard Gluten Free Diet (SGFD).  Equally detrimental, we tend to rely heavily on sodas, artificially flavored and artificially sweetened waters, diet drinks, sports drinks (c’mon, unless you REALLY are an athlete, actively participating in an intense sport that is at that moment producing sweat, it's not warranted, and coconut water is a far better source of electrolytes and hydration), cool-aides, and even fruit juices, etc., which not only contain loads of sugar (fructose is still sugar and needs to be balanced with fiber and a protein source at a minimum—and definitely kept to a minimum—water, folks!  Good old WATER!), but also artificial sweeteners, artificial flavors, food dyes, preservatives and high fructose corn syrup.  These are all empty calories that sap the body's energy stores, stress the liver and kidneys (the body's detoxifying organs, which the skin is also a big one--so put only good things on and in), and wreak havoc on a tiny body especially, and even more so, an unborn one.  

If these are things that typically land in your grocery cart, there's so much more to solving the puzzle than simply going gluten free, or than simply looking for the pseudo “whole grains” on processed and packaged foods.  If the nutrients are first stripped from the ingredients, and then must be artificially added back in or "fortified," that’s not real food, and it shouldn’t comprise the majority of anyone’s diet.  

We chose in early infancy not to rely on drugs with our son, and we successfully support behavior issues and improve his function in school with diet and by limiting sugar and avoiding many chemicals that pose as *food*.  We put lots of good things IN, and avoid all the bad we can.  That’s not to say we don’t buy cereal or kid snacks or indulge in pizza, hot dogs (OM Selects—no nitrates or nitrites, which are very bad for the heart, Natural Choice is another option with no nitrates or nitrites), or cupcakes on occasion, but one key thing for my son's wellness is knowing that he requires a good source of animal protein with his carbs, or his body simply can’t process them in a way that allows him to be in control of his choices and his focus.  

Maybe once a week or less, my son used to choose Chex cereal, for instance.  I'd mix that with Perky’s Crunch Flax with Chia to reduce the sugar grams he was getting per serving, and the chia boosts the protein grams.  And no, I didn’t love the GMOs, but sometimes we must pick our battles, it wasn't something he ate daily because VARIETY is our focus, and we balance those carbs with protein, always, especially at breakfast.  We've since compared labels and both reduced sugar grams and chosen a corn cereal that's a member of the Non GMO Project in Enviro-Kidz Amazon Flakes. My son gets a local, farm fresh egg (including duck eggs when they’re available) and some varied source of meat with a SMALL bowl of cereal or with his small serving of gluten-free pancakes (with added milled flax) or waffles with a little pure maple syrup (no HFCS fake stuff of the appealing “Aunt” variety) for breakfast every morning.  He still gets to be a kid, but we’ve always fed him more like an adult and his palate is sophisticated and varied because of it. These are the most important ways I keep my particular kid well, and may be helpful to keep in mind with your kids, too. Ours is a kid who eats a veggie-filled omelet on occasion, breakfast tacos, fish that isn’t breaded, craves salad, eats sautéed spinach, beans, and a variety of vegetables …but not broccoli, and not mushrooms, he hates those, and says, “My taste will never change on mushrooms, Mom.  They’re disgusting!”

There are two more important factors for our family, which I will discuss in my coming book. My son has taken supplements all his life, and in fact since before he was born.  As well, physical activity improves his brain/body connection and self-discipline—for us, Taekwondo has been extremely beneficial.  Once it was safe for him to do so, my husband began working out four days a week.  I was doing a good job walking on a regular basis last fall, and hoped to get back at it as soon as winter released it’s frigid hold on our region (I really need to do it anyway, but motivating myself to exercise alone has always been a huge struggle for me, something I have plans to get your help with in the near future), but I haven't yet managed to make it a priority. I love and miss yoga, and hope to come up with a way to incorporate yoga classes into my life again.

A great deal of my energy goes to grocery shopping, to sourcing and preparing food.  I go to a great deal of thought and effort to incorporate VARIETY into our diet, in particular where carbs are concerned, but we also consciously rotate the meats we eat.  If I get lazy, my son and husband tend to get mild to not-so-mild illnesses. We work hard to eat whole food blends and we vary our intake of brown rice, certified gluten-free oats, organic corn, quinoa, teff, millet, buckwheat, etc. (buckwheat is gluten free and is not related to wheat.  If you're not gluten-free, you can work-in organic sources of 100% whole wheat, spelt, and kamut).  We rotate meatless meals, as well as several meals a week that don’t contain any grains, including experimenting with things like coconut flour and almond meal, and we vary the brands of the products we typically buy.  This practice keeps us all much healthier, and my son hasn’t had an episode of croup in ages.  The last time he did, I knew exactly why.

Does it take thoughtfulness, work and planning?  It does.  Was it difficult to get my husband to participate in these ideas? It was for him personally, but never for our son.  He was always more than willing to do whatever worked best to help our son succeed in school, remain unmedicated, stay well, and he's always supported my experimenting.  There’s nothing like being defibrillated six times, however, to make a man sit up and take notice on his own behalf. I hope that will never be necessary for the ones you love, and I hope I’ve given you something to think about to help keep your family well during cold, flu, and allergy season.

My husband is a man of many talents.  Getting him to write them down or talk about them, however, is akin to tugging a toy out of my grand puppy’s ever so cute but yappy little jaws.

Well, FYI, the hubs and I can both pretty much rock it in the kitchen.  He prefers the elbowroom of cooking by himself.  I rather enjoy the process of cooking together, or at least having company in the kitchen while I’m doing so.  True, I maybe interject my “thoughts” from time to time, which he doesn’t always welcome.   In the chili department, however, it’s hands-off for me.  I’ll occasionally venture into white chicken chili territory, but as a former firefighter (and paramedic and police officer, and don’t forget Eagle Scout—basically freaking Captain America) and highly-sought-after-back-in-the-day firehouse cook, traditional Firehouse Chili is all him, all day long. 

I wouldn’t have it any other way.  

Scott’s Firehouse Chili was a consistent favorite when we had our restaurant in downtown Benton Harbor from 1999 to 2002, The Main Street Café.  We served it mild (as written here), medium, Hot Damn, or Somebody Call 911.  It remains beloved among friends and family when he makes it today, and it promises to be a big winner for your Super Bowl or other gathering. 

If you happen to be the sort with venison in your freezer, chili is a super #MOREin2014 way to rotate VARIETY into your diet using a cleaner, leaner meat*.  If you’re not the sort, my apologies, but we’re from Michigan, and we are.  Or my husband is.  And thank goodness, because the meat he was able to put in our freezer has been a welcome and necessary addition this long, frigid, underemployed winter**.

I believe one of the major issues our nation faces in terms of wellness is lack of variety in our diets.  Eating the same few things (which generally include wheat three or more times a day, or rice if you're gluten free) day in and day out, week after week, is extremely stressful and/or over stimulating to the immune system.  So think outside the (processed) box by cooking at home, and outside the chicken, pork, turkey, or beef quadrangle.  Those who choose to eat meat might seek cleaner sources from local farmers who sell shares or sides of the livestock they raise.  Ask questions and be mindful of how they feed, accommodate, and treat their livestock, to make sure their standards align well with your own.

Bottom line, chili is a hearty, healthy, delicious, flexible and naturally gluten free meal that can satisfy anyone, and this recipe is among the best out there, because my hubby is among the best out there, in my humble opinion.  I think I’ll keep him.

Follow my GANEPossible.com board on Pinterest for many #MOREin2014 ideas.  If gluten-free is a particular concern for your family, then you might like my Gluten-Free Moms board.  And do subscribe (right over there --->) to receive my upcoming Quick Minute to GANE Empowered Wellness Newsletter in your inbox!

Wash and dice all the vegetables and combine with all the beans and tomato sauce and diced tomatoes in a large stock pot.  Season with chili powder, pepper, salt, garlic, and black pepper.

In a separate pan, brown the beef/venison, etc. seasoned as above (at approximately half the amounts listed) for the vegetables.  You’ll taste and adjust along the way.  Once browned (you may want to drain off some of the fat), combine in the pot and bring to a slow boil.

Add the mushrooms, continue to cook, and re-season to taste – add some of the chipotle pepper here too.

Reduce the heat to low and simmer for up to 2 hours.  Turn off – better refrigerated overnight and eaten the second day if you can wait that long.

Serve hot with fresh raw onion, cilantro, cheese and a dollop of sour cream.  

And you won’t be sorry for making a batch of my Gluten Free Cornbread to go with!

Copyright 2014 (c) Scott R. Gane, All Rights Reserved

LOVE my ladies over at Midlife Boulevard and READ some of the other great Super Bowl Party Posts!!

*If you’re not a hunter or don’t know anyone who is, venison can be purchased at better butchers and supermarkets (although it would be farm-raised and thus not as clean as wild and not considered sustainable unless the farm in question uses sustainable practices).  Bison, lamb, goat, turkey, chicken, or beef, ground or in bite-size chunks, would all work, too.  If you prefer a vegetarian chili, HVP-type (hydrolyzed vegetable protein, which is not considered safe for those that require gluten-free, and let’s face it, is fake) chunks or crumbles or tofu would work equally well.  This is heavy on the beans, so you could opt to serve it over brown rice, which would complete the chain of amino acids necessary to provide a complete protein without any meat or meat substitute. 

**I am proud of my state’s dual concern for conservancy and the wellness of our land, where maintaining the proper balance in the deer population is an ever-changing annual effort and concern. 

Require Gluten Free?  Use Caution with these ingredients:  cheaper store brands or blends of canned beans may contain wheat starch (we like to use organic when we’re able, and BPA free).  Read the label.  Packaged, pre-shredded cheese may contain a separating agent.  Check with the manufacturer to make sure it meets your family’s needs or shred your own from a block using a box grater.    

There's a reason I hadn't written a new post on my *other* site since the beginning of the school year when my stomach was in knots over my food sensitive kid's first male teacher (he's doing fine, btw).   A number of things have occurred since, which left me ambivalent about continuing with a gluten-free site at all (especially with one called GlutenNaziMom). 

After almost two years blogging, today I received my first hate comments.

I was advised having such a brand would take some special care, but that there were ways around it.  It was catchy.  It worked for Seinfeld.  When my son was born and I had teenaged daughters in the house, Seinfeld was still a part of our social landscape.  I have to wonder now if social media would have put a stop to the running SoupNazi skit from it's first airing.  Instead, it became a part of nearly everyday language in our house, and in many houses across America.

I had teenagers making PB&Js, macaroni and cheese, frozen pizzas, all while I was trying to navigate life with a newborn.  The puzzle of figuring out what made him uncomfortable, difficult to please, aka, "high needs," combined with the risk of cross-contamination when I was still learning and trying to catch my bearings did make me a GlutenNaziMom.

Seinfeld, however, I am not.  

My son took six years to get here.  I believe that was because of food allergies.  My husband had colitis bordering on Crohn's Disease, I had PCOS and endometriosis and wicked seasonal allergies.  There are reasons our reproductive systems shut down first.  And yes, I believe our food system has a lot to do with why infertility is still rising meteorically.  So I was.  I was a GlutenNaziMom.  Crazed in my efforts to try to get some damn sleep, more than a 20-30 minute catnap at a stretch out of my newborn, which was barely long enough to take a real shower with hair washing and leg shaving and the whole zen peace and solitude thing.

It was a name my teenagers gave me.  It was our effort to find humor in a difficult situation.  It was an effort to laugh at life even when my feelings were hurt.  Even when I had to stand and rock a thirteen-month-old for hours in the middle of the night because otherwise he was screaming, I could only assume, in pain because I'd inadvertently eaten something wrong, possibly the size of a crumb.  It was the way our family, and a whole lot of families that deal with one "food-allergic" kid in the house, try to get through it all from one day to the next.  

It was about vigilance in order to survive our stressful days.  Writing about our struggles and trying to help others was my way of eeking some good out of an often difficult situation.  Would I have traded my son, who took six years to be, for any of it?  Of course not.  But that didn't change the fact that it was a roller coaster more often than not.

When we know better, we do better.  

In mid-2013, I became associated with a remarkable group of midlife women bloggers, several of whom have heritage deeply entwined in and forever affected by Jewish history.  Were any of these remarkable, insightful, supportive women people I wanted to hurt in any way?  Is anti-semitism something I want to contribute to in any way?  My God, no.  

My friend Sharon Greenthal, founding co-editor of the site, Midlife Boulevard, wrote a post on her blog, Empty House Full Mind, which gave me pause (as did the Sunday Review piece which inspired her post, "The Banality of Robbing the Jews").  My own piece and the frustration and fear I expressed back when school began also gave me pause.  I felt ensconced in a ten-year-old (47-year-old?) defeatist attitude.  I don't want to be banal about or laugh at something so painful for millions of people, and I don't want to rob anyone of their things, their dignity, or simply their otherwise peaceful day.  Though I don't think the commenter is someone familiar with peace.

And I was tired.  

And my son is ten.  He often chooses and prepares food for himself these days.  Everyday he shows me that he's becoming more and more his own man.  And what am I discovering?  That remarkably, my son embraces an attitude of, "that's gluten free?  You mean I can try that," versus, "Whoa-is-me, I can't eat anything!"  

The truth is, because our grocery cart and thus our crisper drawers are always full of good things, because the meals we prepare at home are chock full of items from the produce aisle and contain far fewer boxed and prepared processed foods than many typical American ten-year-olds might encounter on a regular basis, my son recognizes that the world is full of an abundance of foods he can eat--Variety and Vegetables.  I did that.  My grandfather, who lived to be 100, and my mother did that.  I did that for my daughter even when I was a single mom.  It's a legacy my family has passed down which does something pretty magical:  It keeps us well.

That's the gold.  That's what is unique and special about my family and how we approach the fact that we happen, now that my daughters are grown women in charge of their own households, to be a gluten-free one.  And I can embrace the positive.  I can forgive myself for my prior process of scarcity, blame, fear, to embrace a new philosophy of #MOREin2014.

The truth is, crunchy and militant isn't for everyone.  We all have our own struggles and stresses and we have to choose the battles that make sense for our families.  If more of us just do a little better, become a little more aware, it has the power to be far more impactful than a handful of crunchy people waving signs around.

And I'd much rather be a part of a positive movement than cause someone to viscerally recall such a negative, hurtful, devastating moment in the collective history of our humanity.  

A year ago, I didn't have a clue what I would do if I weren't defined by GlutenNaziMom.  If I weren't locked in the baggage of life's difficult moments, what could I do?  What could I be?  It's taken me this year to process.  With some pretty intense coaching from Nancy Kaye, of Define Your Destiny, and the best piece of advice she gave me--CLAIM YOUR WORTH!  There is NO REASON on Earth You Don't Deserve Success and Happiness--it took me all of 2013 to grow and embrace all that my life is, versus all that's maybe a wee bit difficult about it.  And to roll with the punches, to keep on keepin' on, even in the face of nastiness.

I thank the commenter who provided the impetus I needed to take the step I was having a hard time committing to—I’ve taken down the site.

I'm a work in progress.  When we know better, we do better.  I'm still here.  And I surrender.  

Letting go of scarcity to embrace my grandfather's and my brilliant and beautiful son's attitude of abundance feels pretty damn great.  And I'm just a little proud of my part in getting him, getting us, there. 


NOTE:  This post was written (meh, a couple days late to the party, albeit a very timely topic) as part of a #MidlifeBlvd bloghop.  One thing I know about these ladies?  There will be a plethora of hugely valuable best advice and information they ever received.  I hope you'll read through some of the other posts.

AUTHOR UPDATE 12/15/13:  I'm so grateful to have received permission from the authors to include my two favorite stories from the wonderful #Flashversary competition that took place recently over at Flash! Friday.  Yvonne Rupert's story, which received a well-deserved Honorable Mention, "Clara's Dragon," suits the empowering message we hope to inspire with the January 2014 Launch of GANEPossible.com, to a T!  Von's story is about a little girl battling nightmares and cancer who chooses a dragon statue in the hospital gift shop, after her "Gramps" told her about them.  Little Clara's dragon proves more than something interesting to look at!  

And I'm equally delighted to introduce my readers to Jacki Donnellan, the WINNER of the #Flashversary competition!!  Jacki's wonderful story of the mysteries of Loch Ness resonated deeply with me.  It brought to mind my maternal grandfather, whose Michigan nickname was "Scotty."  He was English, from the north, and very proud of his feisty Scottish grandfather (lived to be 108--died when he was kicked in the head by the horse he was shoeing--according to family lore).  Though my Gramps would have told his wee lass the boldest of tales, nudged me, and whispered to look up, he was the kind of man who would have fiercely protected the legends, too.  He was born in 1899. Died in 2000. 100 years old, which was precisely his story all along.  It is my grandfather's model for living well that inspires everything I do.  It's what I hope to share and inspire through GANE Possible.  Please enjoy Von's and Jacki's inspiring stories posted below.

No, I'm not a top 10 finalist.  But a dear online friend of mine is, Yvonne Rupert, so I couldn't let the moment pass without recognizing and expressing my gratitude for this weekly contest and what participating in it from time to time has done for me and does for so many others.  Sometimes it's the only creative writing I do all week, which has become so important to my mental health.  This is something I gift myself with when the prompt of the week inspires, as I've posted before.  And btw, Von is also one of our #JudyBlumeProject contributors!  So send her some love & luck!  We sure are!

The beautiful photo prompt that inspired the #Flashversary competition, above, chosen by Rebekah Postupak--our Dragon Lady of Flash!--inspired me, particularly because the very thing that keeps us from writing is so often referred to as our dragon--the roars or whispers that tell us we're not good enough.  It's so difficult to overcome.  But it's important to acknowledge that I've communicated with a LOT of writers over the last two years, and no matter how prolific or profound their writing, WE ALL STILL DOUBT OURSELVES!  Which is why it's so very important, win or not, to try, to learn, to take part, to WRITE.  

I cannot believe the amount of work Rebekah and the judges put into this each week.  My sincerest thanks and congratulations go out to them on how huge it's become in a short year.  It shows how powerful flash fiction is as a writing medium.  What a level playing field it is.  How appealing it is to read.  And I believe it is essential for writers to find contests like this to give ourselves the mental exercise.  To break away from projects we're working on (even if they are creative, sometimes we need a shift), and for me, to dabble creatively, while most of the writing I've been doing lately doesn't feel terribly creative.  

Here was my post in the competition, which had to be 350 words exactly:

I am blown away by the power in these beautiful stories, and deeply grateful to Jacki and to Von for allowing me to share them here (and to Rebekah for brokering the deal!).  I hope they, and the stories of so many others, inspire you as they have me, to battle your writing (or any other) dragon if you have one.  I can tell you from experience, it opens up worlds of possibilities and potential.  And I'm only getting started!  Stay tuned....!

If our stories or the photograph prompt above inspired you to recall a memory, to write a story or essay, I invite you to share it in the comments below.  GO!

I’ve written often about my fear of failure, and my equally daunting fear of success.  These fears have sat equally sour in my belly since high school.  I’m afraid to be nothing, afraid of not fulfilling my purpose, but I’m equally afraid of how my life might change if I do succeed in doing what it is that same gut keeps niggling at me over and over, telling me I’m meant to do.

If only that gut spoke plain English.

But it doesn’t.  It speaks in code.  It speaks in hieroglyphics, in tongues at which I’m left to decipher and guess.

I know it’s always a mistake when I ignore my gut.  Lord knows, ignoring that flip in the hollow of my stomach before I got into a car with a guy I didn’t know when another guy I did know asked his “friend” to give me a ride home was a big mistake.  Did my “friend” know this was his bud's M.O?  I was too ashamed, so I never told.  How many girls had the bud done this to?  Had anyone else ever reported it?  Had there been some kind of secret handshake that passed between them?  Was my friend possibly in on it?

It was the 80s.  We chalked it up to a bad date—a bad choice, my own damn fault (which is complete and utter bull$hit, if you wondered!)—and we moved on. 

But you never really do.

You just learn, time after time, to question and question again your own intelligence, your own abilities.  You question your own gut’s messages about right or wrong, its whispers about do it or don’t do it, its twinges and twists and which way they mean for you to go. 

Speak English, damn you!

Just tell me, please.  What is it you want me to do?  Which answer is the right one to help me feed my family?

“Girgle, girgle,” crickets….

—sigh--

Somehow, when it's about your own life, Intuition can be a bitch, and Doubt, her master.

Then something I spent an entire weekend berating myself over for yet another failure, with perspective morphed into opportunity, into action, an honest to goodness aha!

I made a phone call.  I felt certain.    

What I thought I felt certain about became something else entirely.  A lunch turned into a three-hour meeting, into a tour, into another impromptu meeting, into a follow-up meeting next week.

I’m in awe, I’m awakened, and I have a vision that has never been clearer.  

Everything in my life has led up to this presentation next week, to this moment.  The dots connect, the failures make sense, every moment of the last two years of hard work and educating myself, the odd job, the “gifts” that seem not at all related, slip effortlessly together with a clang of realization.

All of this is to say that, my cooking demonstration planned for The Box Factory on December 11th has met with some challenges that make it impossible to pull off in the time-frame I’d allotted myself (so we'll do it in late January, likely that week before the Super Bowl).  

But please stay tuned for something that could be, that will be, bigger and better and incredibly exciting!   

I’m working on the presentation of my life this week.  So don’t think I’ve buried myself under a bush to lick at my wounds…I’m strategizing, I’m pulling it all together like never before.

I’m listening to my gut and writing down its every note, because for once its intentions are clear and beautiful as perfect harmony.  Which, when I remember what it felt like to sit in the middle of a choir of voices, brings me to tears, each and every time.  Heck, maybe one day I'll incorporate that into this little project of mine, too.


**If you didn't already, check out http://www.supportacappella.org -- who needs instruments?! Music ed for FREE!**

Just Write is a weekly writing exercise sponsored by Heather of the Extraordinary Ordinary, WHO ROCKS! Hadn't participated in awhile, but this reflection definitely fits.

There are some traditions we can't do without.  At Thanksgiving, without apologies, stuffing is just one of them. And come to think of it, fall chili without cornbread?  That's just wrong, too.  

One of the problems with a gluten-free diet can quickly become too much weight gain if you focus solely on replacing items from the Standard American Diet (SAD!) swap for swap (erm...SADly, that's how I learned to do it over eleven years ago).  Even so, adopting a gluten free diet doesn't have to mean forgoing all your seasonal favorites.  Maybe it just means freezing the leftovers instead of allowing Thanksgiving to last a full week.  Maybe you serve a salad first, or you consciously incorporate more clean vegetable dishes into the meal than you might have done in the past.  It may take a little training, patience and dedication for your palate to come to anticipate and enjoy this type of meal, but here's why it's worth asking yourself and your family to work toward just that.    

My Thai Butternut Bisque would be a great accompaniment or first course to your Thanksgiving spread, for instance.  Or here's a fantastic recipe for roasted Brussels Sprouts with real bacon (um, HELLO!  Who doesn't like the sound of that?! And if you don't have access to the kind of bacon he's talking about, at least go for something like Hormel's Natural Choice or Oscar Meyer Selects brands that contain no nitrates or nitrites--they're bad juju!).  Maybe instead of the canned gluten-ous sodium, I mean, soup version of the usual green bean casserole, you use the freshest beans you can find and experiment with some real diced onions (or shallots) and mushrooms.  A bit of Greek yogurt flavored with thyme, a little garlic powder (or preferably the real thing), salt and pepper and a bit of The Wizard's vegan/wheat-free Worcestershire sauce might not taste exactly how you remember, but it's gluten free and it's much cleaner, and absolutely delicious.  Chopped pecans or walnuts or slivered almonds can lend a satisfying crunch instead of the usual fried onions.  Or if they're an absolute must, slice some onions very thinly, dip them in a little thin #GF pancake batter, and shallow pan fry them to sprinkle sparingly over the dish.  Sure, it's a little more work than opening a can.  But it'll be a much more satisfying holiday when you can enjoy your tryptophan-induced coma on the sofa with everyone else instead of on the bathroom floor, in massive abdominal pain from a gluten reaction.

So, the day or night before the feast, make a double batch of this wonderful, almost cake-like cornbread, let it sit out overnight and use it to make your family's traditional cornbread stuffing, whatever that may be (be mindful of the other components, and ensure ahead of time that things like sausage, broth, and seasonings are all gluten-free--you might need to do a brand switch, so read labels, contact manufacturers, don't just grab, and don't assume the brands you've used in the past are safe).  

I wish I could give you my husband's recipe, but I'm usually up late baking the cornbread and the dessert, and he's up early with the bird, the stuffing, and the potatoes.  When the daughters are around, just like those damn crescenty rolls taunting from the other end of the table, there's a very small dish of old-fashioned syrup and marshmallow covered sweet potatoes (which I have never enjoyed, even as a kid).  Otherwise, we either mash or beautifully roast those, too.  

TONS of options on my Pinterest board, check it out.

I first came across a gluten free cornbread recipe we liked on CanadaBBHosts.com, from Jan and Bob Wheeler of the Chimney Corner Bed & Breakfast and Cottages in Nova Scotia.  Someplace I'd like to visit someday!  If I get the chance, I think I'll stay there, knowing they're celiac-friendly, and thus would easily be able to meet my non-celiac gluten sensitive needs.  ENJOY!  And please know how very thankful I am for all of you who have followed and supported my blog throughout this past year.  I believe that everyone should have enough, and that anything is possible, including a gal like me influencing people's lives and helping to make them better.  It's all I've ever wanted to do, and you help make that Possible!  

Without further ado, here's the wonderful #GF cornbread recipe I've adapted over the years to serve our needs and tastes.   Bless you and yours, and happy holidays!  

1 cup unsweetened original almond milk

1 egg (works great with flax substitute for vegan)

1/4 cup oil

1/4 teaspoon org apple cider vinegar

1/3 cup arrowroot starch 

1/2 cup tapioca starch

1 teaspoon salt

1/4 teaspoon baking soda

1 Tablespoon gf baking powder

1 cup organic yellow corn flour

1/2 cup or less organic sugar

1/2 teaspoon xanthan gum

2 T milled FLAX seed (1 if you use flax sub for egg)

(In an effort to reduce the sugar, I've made this in the past with 3/4 cup almond milk and substituted 1/4 cup of the sugar with a scant 1/4 cup agave nectar [agave is sweeter than sugar, and has become a controversial ingredient--I don't think I would want the flavor of maple syrup, which could also be used, so if you're not opposed to agave, choose raw organic--you could also leave the milk alone, and substitute the granulated sugar for xylitol].  Particularly for a savory purpose like stuffing, just using a bit less sugar works fine, too.)

Preheat oven to 375 degrees F.  In a large measuring cup, combine milk, egg, oil, and vinegar.  Mix well.  Add all dry ingredients to a medium bowl and whisk together.  Pour the wet mixture over the dry and mix thoroughly.  I use a fork, making sure to scrape down the sides and get all the dry incorporated off the bottom.  Coat or spray a cast-iron skillet with oil.  Cornbread is always best in a cast-iron skillet, and GF is no different, but of course an 8x8 cake pan or muffin tin works, too.  Muffin papers haven't worked so well for this recipe (sticks), so I would just spray or coat the tin.  


Bake for 25 - 30 minutes (may take a bit less time for cast-iron).  The top will be lightly browned and a toothpick inserted in the center will come out clean.  Serves 8-9.  Double this recipe if you want stuffing leftovers!  We've done the stuffing in a muffin tin, too, which was delicious, with crispy edges for all, and they froze well!


[The cornbread pictured was made with the flax vegan substitute.  Without the yolk for color, and because I was using organic corn flour, which isn't as brilliant yellow as either "Over the Counter" or corn meal, it looked a little pasty.  I added just a bit of natural yellow food coloring to make it more appealing to my family.  And boy, was it!!  ENJOY!]